Come back baby, please come back

Men are happier people:
What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000 Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.

So continuing on with the soundtrack of my life, I found a song that relates to my (lack of) realtionship with dream guy

Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne

Hey Hey You You
I don't like your girlfriend
No way No way
I think you need a new one
Hey Hey You You
I could be your girlfriend

Hey Hey You You
I know that you like me
No way No way
No, it's not a secret
Hey Hey You You
I want to be your girlfriend

You're so fine
I want you mine
You're so delicious
I think about you all the time
You're so addictive
Don't you know
What I can do
To make you feel alright

Don't pretend I think you know
I'm damn precious
And hell yeah
I'm the mother fucking princess
I can tell you like me too
And you know I'm right

She's like so whatever
You can do so much better
I think we should get together now
And that's what everyone's talking about

Hey Hey You You
I don't like your girlfriend
No way No way
I think you need a new one
Hey Hey You You
I could be your girlfriend

Hey Hey You You
I know that you like me
No way No way
No, it's not a secret
Hey Hey You You
I want to be your girlfriend

I can see the way
I see the way
You look at me
And even when you look away
I know you think of me
I know you talk about me all the time
again and again

So come over here
and tell me what I wanna hear
Better, yet, make your girlfriend disappear
I don't wanna hear you say her name ever again


OK, I have no idea if the 2nd verse is true (it would be nice if it was, but I doubt it).

Found this in my April Reader's Digest. The money "provides the means to send children on a camping adventure - a week to forget about cancer and a week to share experiences with friends - a week to do art - a week to laugh and enjoy the wonders of summer!" So, it's a great cause. It sucks when anyone gets cancer, but children are just trying to grow up, they don't need to dealw ith cancer as well.